In the news: Because we're on holiday in two hours

...But we still have to work on friday!! HAHAHAHAHA WE'RE POOR! O there is news 2:

*Be thankful that you aren't getting hosed down and beat up all goddamn day; conservatism is stagnation, and has no choice but to lose. Things ARE changing. [detroit news]

*Obama is perfect and will paint the American flag pink and and off-white, because those are cute colors together (I dunno). [Bay Windows]

*Harvey Milk was pretty awesome, too. [huffpo]

*Florida gets kicked in the nuts, from behind, as their abortion ban gets deemed unconstitutional. STOP MAKING DOUCHEBAG LAWS! They will always be struck down, at some point in history. With your free time, make a plan on how you will come out of the closet instead. Send us emailz and we will announce it here! [nytimes]

*Mormons may have been shady with their monies, and The Terminator State will look into this. Now from my favorite, irrelevant line from T2: "Hold this." [freep]

* "Gay rights leaders hope to build a $1-million war chest to defend any judge threatened with recall for ruling in favor of gay marriage, leaders announced during a conference call with supporters Tuesday night." [lat]

* "The Ministry of Defence (MoD) has been ordered to pay nearly £190,000 to a lesbian soldier who was sexually harassed by a male sergeant." [BBC]

*Dumb hicks in Kansas hate gay people and aren't remotely self-conscious about it, for they are too ignorant, and so hold sign saying Obama is the anti-kryst, and reminding everyone that Jesus died before his roommate could get him drunk and explore bodies with him. [the oregonian]

In the news: Uppity gay people

Some gays can't just take what they are given and be happy and so are protesting on top of America. From a newsource known as the Age:

'BEARING signs such as "No More Mr Nice Gay" and "We're Not Asking for Five Wives — Just One", more than 10,000 New Yorkers yesterday joined in a nationwide backlash against California's voting down of same-sex marriage rights.

'It was the second major protest within days in New York, the previous one targeting the Mormon Church ... for its role in financing the anti-gay marriage campaign.


... "We are not going to rest until every citizen in every state in our country has the right to stand up and say this is the man or woman I love and we want to express that love in the form of marriage," he said.'

[Gay rights anger goes nationwide]

In the news: Mormons under attack as gays give Anthrax Makeover to local church!

Some good samaritans tried to donate their leftover cocaine to a buncha Mormons but they got all pissed. Now they think the gay mafia's Al-Quaeda Terror-Cell Department is trying to same-sex marry them into an early grave by burying them up to their necks in anthrax. Or something...:

Someone sent envelopes containing a suspicious (but, it turns out, harmless) white powder to the Salt Lake City headquarters of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and to an LDS temple in Los Angeles.

The church says the culprits are extremists who opposed the recently enacted ban on gay marriage in California. Mormons were among those who were most active in getting the measure passed.

But according to this Associated Press story, "Investigators have not publicly cited any evidence that the mailings were linked to the Mormon church's support of the measure, and a gay rights group in Utah disputed that gay protesters were involved."

Just like a bunch of gay queers to send expired anthrax to straight churches filled with American taxpayer dollars. If I could give any advice to the WAR ON MORMON VALUES, it would be to just flood them with copies of the Latter Days Double-Disc Extra-Heresy Edition, until they finally stand up to their parents and run-off with their promiscuous gay boyfriends just like the star-crossed lovers in the groundbreaking nu-classic.

[original article]